Day Fourteen with Cancer

Day Fourteen with cancer:

I've officially reached the two week mark since my diagnosis.  Even though those first couple of days seemed to last an eternity, it doesn't seem like it could have been two weeks already.

I'm thinking about doing a serious detox.  In this case it would mean ridding myself of toxic people.  I'm finding myself far less able to deal with drama than I used to be.  It used to be tiring, but right now it's just down right exasperating.  I'm not sure what to do with it.

Today was fairly productive.  I was able to work on some laundry as I got ready for work.  I headed out early so that I could make a couple of stops.  I stopped at Giant Eagle to pick up some Barnes and Noble gift cards and then went to Barnes and Noble to buy myself a present.  I decided yesterday that I was going to buy a Nook Color.  Yes, it's an impulse purchase...Yes, it's a LARGE impulse purchase, but I received a rather large tax return and I'd rather not cart a ton of books to the hospital with me.  After I made my purchase, I had a rather entertaining time with the gentleman who was helping me with the setup...Adam, I believe.  I grabbed an ice tea lemonade on the way out, and headed to work.

When I arrived at work, there were signs on all of the doors for a Pampered Chef party that will be held on the 26th of this month on my behalf.  That meant a lot to me.  Stephanie also told me that the school/church are working on scheduling a Chik-fil-A night for me.  It's amazing to see people rallying together for me.  It's not like there was a giant natural disaster and lots of people were affected.  It's just me.  I was able to get in touch with a couple more people for the fundraiser that Jay and I are planning.  We also have to get together at the bank to open a special account.  I really hope this goes as well as it is playing out in my head.  It could be a really fun evening.

I went to my room and got on the phone...one good convo, one bad.  Not sure what to do about the bad. It seems never ending.  I cannot deal with it now.  When and if I'll ever be able to is still uncertain.  I was, however, able to speak with a friend I haven't spoken with in a very long time.  We had a slight falling out several years ago and I called after my diagnosis to just make sure everything was good between us.  He is a busy politician, so it sometimes takes him a while to get back.  When he called a couple of days later, I was unavailable.  He called again tonight and it was the first time I've heard his voice in what seems like ages.  It was so nice.  We got to laughing and reminiscing and I finally asked, "When did we get old?"  He replied, "I think it was when we closed our eyes."  How true.  We close our eyes and our lives slip away.  He had me tearing up during the whole conversation.  He kept telling me about all that he admired in me and kept saying things like, "You're radiant!"  It was all too much.  It meant a lot to me that someone thought so highly of me and was able to express it.

Now it's that time again...time to close my eyes.  Tomorrow I'll be older.  I felt older when I opened my eyes today.  I'm hoping there's not much difference tomorrow morning.  I can only take so many burdens at once.  If it doesn't let up a little, I'm going to age a LOT while my eyes are closed this time.  Today it just seems like the sorrow of situations is really getting to me.  Well, I guess that leads to my verse of the day...

Verse of the Day: Psalm 30:5
...Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.


Song of the Day: Still
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1DqiNr1htM